In my very first session of this rundown, I saw my lack of confront and how it had cost me uncertainty and loss of power.
I have cleaned up my first dynamic over the past few months which has brought me to this place in my processing and my ability to, first, see my lack of confront, and, second, have the confidence in my ethics and able to have and handle power.
I feel no fear in being able to confront, although I realize that this is where I am now, and that as I continue processing that I will be given commands for me to confront more. But I am very happy right now with my win.
Having put my first dynamic in better order allowed me to assess my other dynamics which I assessed are in ethics, although, not very active. So I am starting to create a more vibrant future for myself, although I am enjoying the bigger space I am operating in with less and very manageable randomity, few unfinished comm cycles, more clarity, more desire and certainty to postulate. I feel I am in control of time.
And it all seems so simple to me: Understand and apply ethics, confront and handle with the tech.
Over the years I have heard the expression, something of the sort, that the only thing that traps a thetan is his own consideration. This now make so much sense to me.
From my completion of the Ethics course twice, Student Hat course twice, the comprehensive OEC course, my 18 years of auditing (taking my time to get it right), I am confident in my knowledge of how the universe is governed by ethics, and the truth that “the tech will go in if ethics are in.” I feel really good about having my ethics in and that I am applying the tech naturally and without thinking. It all seems to be coming together.
I am enjoying the phenomenon of operating in a bigger space in which there is very manageable randomity*, fewer unfinished comm cycles, more clarity, more certainty.
I used to feel a sense of urgency that I had to study/audit everyday, and I now feel very relaxed about my progress so far. I am glad I have taken my time, and repeated courses to gain more understanding and certainty.
I am kind of glad that I still have very far to go up the Bridge and not feeling in any hurry.
I am relaxed in the knowing that I can confront life here and no longer urgency to do or be or have or find a problem. I know that the problem will present itself and that I will be able to confront and handle, and move on to the next one.
I have started taking care of my body and this has given me more ability to control my mind as I am not putting so much attention on my body, beating myself up over what I should eat, how much I should eat, exercise, etc. I am motivated to take care of my body, see it as separate from me and understand that if I can just keep it humming along, then I can put my attention on life.
*Randomity – The amount of predicted and unpredicted motion a person has, in ratio. He likes 50/50. (Tech Dictionary)